My Daddy owned a bank. His idea of a suitable husband came with a Trust Fund, Certificates of Deposit, and at least a VP at the end of his name with assurance that the next abbreviation would be Mr. My Father-in-law Died' and left me in charge as PRES.
Somehow I felt I would disappoint him in my choice of a husband. Even though I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth and never wanted for anything, I felt there was something missing in my life. Call it a sense of purpose other than stitching samplers, setting a proper table and attending high-falutin' social events.
I shouldn't complain, afterall, I did meet my future husband at one of those social events sponsored by Daddy's Bank. I can honestly say it was love at first sight for me, but I resisted the immediate attraction I felt when we were introduced.
"Miss Fannie Mae may I present Mr. Freddy Mack." As our hands touched in greeting, my ears started ringing, but I heard... "he is an Under___"...the buzzing grew louder as I looked into those deep blue eyes....the introduction continued..."Freddy is associated with the Certificate of D___buzzzz Registry buzzzz in the Fun____BUZZZZ _____BUZZZ_____Home______BUZZZZZZZtttt." It was not until our handshake ended that the buzzzzzzing stopped and I heard Freddy ask if he could get me some punch. It seemed he took my non-speaking and slack jaw as needing something to wet my whistle.
For several months Freddy and I carried on a discreet relationship...meeting at resturants, movie houses and under the guise of double dating. He didn't seem to fully understand my reluctance in his meeting my father, but didn't push the issue until he insisted on asking Daddy for my hand in marriage. I was thrilled and terrified at the same time.
"Daddy, I would like you to meet my beau Fre_____". "FREDDY my BOY....about time Fannie brought you home."
I was flabbergasted as they shook hands and patted each other the back like they had known each other for years. "FATHER", I squeaked, "you know Freddy? You knew we were seeing each other?"
"Why of course I know Freddy. He is Vice President and Chief Underwriter of Certificates of Deposit in the Funding and Financial Department of my Banks Home Office." Of course I knew you were seeing each other. I introduced you. What took you so long?"
I was stunned by his answer. My mouth went dry and the buzzing in my ears became a ROAR.
When I came to on the settee, I looked into Freddy's deep blue eyes and said,
"I thought you were an Undertaker
with the Certificate of Death Registry at a Funeral Home".
with the Certificate of Death Registry at a Funeral Home".
Hi Sue - lovely story and very typical of the times, I'd guess - the men would be aware and informed, yet the daughter felt she was behind a curtain ...
ReplyDeleteFun and I love their names - cheers Hilary
Oh Lordy Sue - you're too funny. Fannie Mae and Freddy Mac - perfect character names for this story.
ReplyDeleteWendy at Jollett Etc.
This was funny, and I dig the characters :)
ReplyDeleteDamyanti, Co-host A to Z Challenge April 2014, My Latest post
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
underhanded and untimely. Your mini-stories make me laugh out loud.
ReplyDeleteAs a father of a daughter I approve this story, lol. Really I think most parents just want to see their children happy.
ReplyDeleteBrandon Ax: Writer's Storm
All I'm going to share your post on Facebook, because that is just too funny.
ReplyDeleteBest,
Deb@ http://debioneille.blogspot.com